雨又过，天再晴。

It's been long since I've written something here again.
Anyway I'm proud of myself for getting through the hard times ALONE.
I've never really told anyone how and what I felt.
Maybe I did hint everyone about it, but they just couldn't get my hint.
Or maybe they wouldn't even care.
See, I didn't even bother about telling anyone that I've blogged.
Because I believe if they truly care about me, they would look into my blog somehow, someday.
I also believe someday in the future there would be someone who would love me like how I love my ex-girlfriend so much.
As the saying goes, "What goes around, comes around.".
Hence, I gave so much to someone, someone else will give me what I had lost too.
So, I wouldn't remove this blog link on my Twitter, hoping the "she" from the future would read it to understand more about me and my past.

Since I've had this depression or whatever mental/emotional/psychological illness this was, I really did change so much that even I couldn't believe that this is the "me" now.
In the past, I was more easy going and happy-go-lucky.
But now? Maybe I'm more particular about saving my "face", and I really care more about ego and pride.
Having to lose a loved one despite the amount of effort and sacrifices I put in, I'm beginning to feel that the problem lies in me.
After giving so much love to someone, yet being taken for granted, I think the problem is that I was being a too nice person.
Even some friends and classmates are being annoying too.
Ever since then, I'm into this word "RESPECT".
I won't let anyone push and kick me around, even if you're just playing with me.
I may seem easy going and friendly, but don't ever try fucking around with me, because I'm not as simple as I may look.

Anyway, enough of angst words.
Thanks to my "dark period", I'm now more appreciative of everything around me.
I became a more independent person too.
Trust me, even if no one wants to eat lunch with me, I would still go into the food court to eat alone, despite the many weird stares I get from the public.
I've also learnt how to deal with  things better too.
I think my EQ really increases tremendously after this episode of depression.
I've learnt that health is wealth too.
Because in depression, everything comes in a package.
I experienced countless migraine attacks(I used to had lesser of it), IBS(Always had to go to the toilet because my digestive system is fucked up due to the amount of stress I had to deal with), Social Anxiety, extreme fatigue(Especially in the day), giddiness, anger issues(You will feel everything is against you), hopelessness, lack of motivation, forgetfulness, mental blurriness, etc.
I admit, I was supposed to see a psychiatrist, I even had a referral letter, because the doctor couldn't find any cause of my physical illnesses.
I went to the psychiatric clinic alone, but ended up I couldn't pluck out my courage to see the psychiatrist.
Ended up I went loitering around the area and treated myself some western food(I remembered this part vividly).
It was only after one year that I dare to admit, only in this blog.

After experiencing all these downs in life, I can really feel what people are really feeling.
I used to only understand when people tell me that they are sad or depressed.
But now, I can even feel it.
Even when listening music, I used to say this certain song is nice because of the chorus or whatever shit.
But now, I can feel the music, like I can totally feel this deep hidden sadness the composer and singer is trying to portray.
Sometimes, when the music is too intense, like it's really portraying something really sad, it really hits right deep in my emotions, i admit I would teared.
Maybe it's partly because I'm learning music and I'm used to analysing musics so much.
And hey, it really helps learning music better, because after all, music is an art, which is the study of expressing emotions through a certain medium.


I'm not trying to be emotional or what, but sad songs give me this kind of images.



Anyway, got to go.
Bye! (:

Life is weird.

From now on, I'm not going to tweet "Just blogged" whenever I've blogged.

After all, I believe those who want to read it will read.

No use persuading anyone to read it, because I believe only those who truly cares would read.

Sometimes, I think life is weird.

When you let your guards down and be friendly with people, they may take your kindness as weakness and shoot you down.

When you let your guards up and be self-protective with people, they may see you as someone cold and over-defensive.

Honestly, I've been sick and tired of trying to balance these two points everyday.

Have to keep putting my "layer of wall" up and down when meeting different people.

And worse is others don't know what I've been through in the past, yet they may think I'm weird, two-sided or whatever shit.

If you don't know my past, then don't judge me.

I admit I've been through hell in 2012, and I'm slowly recovering since the start of 2013.

Guys would think I'm anti-social and cold.

Girls would think I'm weird.

The older generations would think I'm rude.

Everyone made me change the way how I see people.

Always thought that guys were fun people, one who I can really talk shit out with.

But I've learnt that they are competitive creatures who will step on others to get high up, and humiliate the weaker ones just for the fun of it.

Always thought that girls were gentle creatures who would always be appreciative and kind.

But I've learnt that they are opposite from what they seemed to be. 

The prettier they are, the more scheming they will be.

And if you treat them nicely, they would take you for granted.

If you treat them badly, you will be deemed as a bad boy.

I admit I'm somewhat stabilised from the ups and downs I've been through now.

I'm much stronger than before, and I know what I really want.

Sometimes, these little setbacks made me ponder, am I a good or bad person?

I really don't know because I'm me, and I don't know what other people sees me as.

Deep in my heart, I know I'm not weird, anti-social, creepy, rude or whatever shit.

Only I know best what I've been through.

It's not me being weird or whatever shit, it's just that I've learnt lessons in my life that changed me to who I am now.

If you really want to judge me, know me long enough before saying any shit.

To those who have always been there for me, I know who you are.
Thank you, and sorry for being like a robot everytime we meet.

Where I really belong?

It's been long since I ever write stuffs here again because nobody actually reads it.

Gonna post some rants today, so hope nobody gets offended.

Even if you're offended, I don't really care.

Sometimes I wonder, do I really belong here?

Living in Singapore for 20 years, I kind of think this place is actually quite fucked up.

Ever since young, I've been told to study hard for my future.

But I never knew the purpose of studying.

People used to told me that the China economy is rising, so we need to learn Mandarin well.

And they always said things would be very competitive during my time - which is now.

It's all true. Everyone is fighting to get accepted into universities, especially NTU and NUS.

But will those who graduated from them lead a better life?

We all had been brainwashed into believing that we need to fight for our opportunity to get into these two local universities, to the point there's a reverse psychology that some of us may even blame the two local universities for creating so much competition.

To me, I still think that education is unrealistic and unnecessary, yet important.

We are forced to study so hard just for a piece of certificate, which can't assure you that you will lead a royal life.

Furthermore, it's always those university graduates doing stupid stuffs such as adulteries and financial scams. 

It means that they have a higher IQ but a lower EQ, which is actually quite useless in this society.

ARGH!! I also hate seeing local universities students wearing so revealing.

And also those who clubs or drinks regularly during the weekends.

They are from Singapore top universities, so can't they be more decent?

If the top is already like that, I think the world is going to end very soon.

And in this land, things get overrated very easily.

Stuffs like Laoban, 4 fingers, Swee Choon, Cold Stone Creamery, Marble Slab, Koi, Everything With Fries, etc - gets popular among teens and tertiary students. But once you really try eating them, it's just so so only.

So everyone is just following the trend?

And local bloggers here with no specific talents gets popular for no reasons. 

Maybe just because they are good looking and everyone sees them as a city girl or city guy.

Finding a good relationship here is also fucking difficult.

Everyone has this 公主病 or 王子病, so they behave like as if they are princes and princesses.

Can't blame anyone because we are living in a city.

City dwellers have stucked up attitudes.

People tend to take things for granted, and they like to behave very "dao". - meaning pretend to ignore others because they think they are of a superior status then them.

And those with the "Those who have it, flaunt it" attitude, I totally despise them.

No use showing off your beauty and wealth, because you will still grow old in the future, and you can't bring money to your afterlife.

No use speaking in a foreign accent when you're just a Singaporean. It's actually fucking disgusting.

The some citizens here hate their own citizens too, which means they could just fucking start a civil war.

And the transport here is ...  I don't know what to say.

To summarise everything: 

The train is so fucking packed and it's fucking slow, takes so long to come.

The bus comes even slower than the train, and it's so fucking pack and jerky.

And some bus drivers are just fucked up too.

The taxis here are expensive like fuck. Just a ride could cost you a 3/4 salary of a part timer's day pay.

To buy a car here, we need to pay $100k COE price which is like don't know what to say.

It's like a first world country with second class transport facilities.

And last but not least is, the weather here is PURE SHIT!

Thanks for reading! (:

chee BYE!!

我最近还好吗？

It's been long since I posted shit over here.
But decided to post something small today since someone is stalking my blog. (:
Not going to say the name here, but she knows who she is.
*wink*

Anyway, many things have changed since I last posted on this blog.
1) Took the first flight of my life.
2) Stepped out of Southeast Asia the first time in my life.
3) I have changed. Maybe?
4) Not as "emo" as the past now. (As seen from the past posts)
5) Final year and I'm graduating soon! 235 days to be exact.

Many people told me I've changed but did I?
I gotta admit I had some internal problems within myself, especially after so many shit I went thru.
But now I'm feeling much better, although still tryna cure some parts of my "broken soul".
There's few stages of a "broken soul".

Denial > Anger > Bargaining > Depression > Acceptance > Self-consciousness

I'm proud to say I've gone through 5 of them and now I'm at the last battle with my "dark self".
There's been many people telling me that I've changed, or people talking to me has this "awkward" feeling.
I was afraid to admit in the past but now since I'm feeling better, I'm gonna admit it!
So please try to keep the conversation up or just forgive me when I'm lazy to talk. (:
It's quite a mental challenge to try to carry on the conversation.
Still trying to work on it.
Will be back to normal soon. (:

Anyway I got back from Taiwan few weeks ago.
It's a fucking nice place over there.
I would say it's better than Singapore in terms of culture, weather, people, food, language.


十分


孔明灯 - It's totally fucking chio.

Next place I wanna go is either Japan or Korea.
After my army I wanna go New York Times Square.
It's all expensive but I'm willing to sacrifice everything for it.
Didn't really travel when I was young.
So now it's time to feed my travel-deprived soul.

Gotta fucking go now.
Signing off...
Nights! (:

43 Facts about ME! :D

1)I'm not really close to my family.
Maybe we really have different horoscope signs? I think we have a different set of thinking and way of life. They are much discipline and fixed, while I do things depending on my mood.

Both my parents are Scorpio, so I'm totally not compatible with them in any ways.
"Gemini will find a Scorpio as too intense, demanding, clingy and intimidating."
Don't really believe in horoscope but this seems quite true.

2)Rather be one-on-one than being in a clique.
Being in a clique will form sub-cliques, which will create buddies.
Why not just go out with just one friend?
It makes bonding easier as well.
It's also harder to speak up your mind when you're in a clique.
You can be as crazy as  you want when you're with your bestie.

3)Sometimes replying messages late and not answering phone calls.
Usually when I don't answer your call or reply messages, the reasons are either:

1. You're from a religious association trying to preach your belief to me.
2. You're my schoolmate or colleague, and I don't wish to talk about work whenever I'm not working or in school.
3. You're a sales person trying to persuade me to buy your product.
4. You call me so late in the night.
5. You're irritating.
6. I'm just too lazy to socialise.

4)I'm actually quite pessimistic.
I may seem like a happy-go-lucky person, but inside me I'm holding lots of fucking shit. I'm the type of person that prepares for the worst.


5)Hate being stuck in a place for so long.
Really don't like being stuck in school or workplace for like the whole day?
Feels so trapped in prison.
Love those jobs that could travel around.

6)Don't like being tied down by others.

Really hate the feeling of being tied down.
Feels so weird when someone attached himself/herself on me.
Maybe I should describe the feeling as "gay-ish"?

7)I have migraine.
Had this chronic illness since young.
That's why everyone always ask me why I carry a Panadol in my wallet.
When you see me talking lesser and catching some sleep wherever I can, it means I've got this shit attacked again.

8)Gets real pissed off easily whenever my sleep is being disturbed.
I don't hate anything more than someone or something disturbs my sleep.
Sleep is fucking important to me.
I treasure sleep more than anything else.
Otherwise I would suffer a migraine attack in the morning again.
Those who doesn't have migraine wouldn't understand this.



9)Really despise/hate/look down/grudge people who does pranks or trolls.
Nothing much to say about this, but please be more mature. (:


10)Hate possessive/obsessive/persuasive people.
Possessive people always tie us down.
Obsessive people always talk about the same thing again and again.
Persuasive people are irritating. Can't they just MIND THEIR FUCKING BUSINESS?

11)Hate it when people change their plans and decisions easily.
Can you please make up your mind and stick to it?
Respect those 风雨不改 people.

12)Kind of like sipping a cup of tea/coffee at the coffee shop alone.

Isn't it good to have some time alone to sort out your thoughts?
Have been addicted to being alone at the coffee shop at late nights, eating supper and stuffs.
No one would disturb me, and the phone is enough to keep me company.

13)ARGH! Hate it when people complain very minor/everyday stuffs to me. I'm a bad listener(unless it's really a problem).
Can't stand those rants about very minor things that everyone faces.
Unless it's a breakup, divorce, cancer, death, or whatever major, then it's okay for me.


14)I can't drink alcohol.
I have alcohol allergies, so I can't drink it at all.
Maybe God is trying to discipline me, cause I know I will drink if I could.




15)I'm addicted to coffee/chocolate.
I can't drink alcohol, so what's the opposite of alcohol?
It's coffee!
Can't help it but to drink it once every 2 days.
If not will have migraines again.



16)Love coming to town area. It's a place where everything is happening. Love the feeling of being a part of everything.

It's where everything is happening.
Why not join in the fun and see what's inside?
It's better than staying at home. 

17)I don't play computer games.

Always lose in whatever game I play.
I'm not a competitive person.
And it's so virtual and unrealistic to me.
Not gonna play it.

18)I can't stand people who are easily excited/happy.

Like weirdos like that eh?


19)Hate following people. Neither do I like people to follow me. Be independent.

I don't like being a copycat, I don't want people to copy me as well.
People generally have different thinking as me, so don't follow me and complain about what I'm doing.
Mind your own business.


20)It's okay to meet me late. But hate it when people leaves early.
I don't mind when people arrive late for our appointment, but don't go overboard like 1 hour++?
I can always do some solo shopping while waiting.
But really hate it when someone has to leave early and leaving me all alone.

21)Hate selective people.
There's some kind of people who only talk to some people whom they wanna talk to.
To me, these type of people look like or act like this:

I don't know why but to me, these people are like "act atas" type, who only talk to certain people.
Yes, they are office ladies, but to me people who are some what like them usually have those "dao" attitude.
Quite disgusted by it.
It's okay cause I don't wanna talk to such people too.


22)I don't really like sharing food, unless you're my girlfriend.

Usually I only buy food when I'm fucking hungry, and I only buy my own share.
I don't really say it but it's quite irritating when someone steals my food.
It's okay to steal them when I'm not hungry, but it's NOT okay when I'm fucking hungry.
RAWH!!!


23)I'm an extremist, although I really hate one myself.
I think it's quite ironic and contradicting, but I hate people who are like me.
I think I'm quite an extreme person, maybe because I'm a Gemini?
Some parts of the horoscope says well about me, although I'm not really into it.

I can either be very lazy, or very hardworking.
Or I can either be very good, or very bad.
It's hard for me to stay at the centre.

Gemini is something like this? Like the 阴阳 opposite from one another.
If I like something, I would be hardworking, doing them from morning till late night.
If I don't like it, I won't even bother to look.

If now is WWII and I'm USA, I wouldn't just throw the Atomic Bomb on Hiroshima and Nagasaki.
I think I would throw on like Kyoto, Tokyo, Osaka, Hokkaido, Okinawa, Sendai, all these big cities.
Must be extreme and let your enemy suffer nicely, only if they attack you. HAHA


24)Don't like taking photos. Unless my face appears nice in it.
Though I don't always say it, but I really don't like taking photos, since young.
I don't know why but everyone is born so good looking while I look so weird in photographs.


25)I hate bringing things out. Empty handed is the best.
I think the things that I always bring whenever I'm out are my keys, wallet, handphone and a packet of tissue paper.
Don't like the feeling of having something to carry when I'm out.
Like the feeling of freedom.


26)I don't like staying out late on the night before I need to wake up early the next day.
Really don't like going out on such nights.
Especially Sunday nights when I will have to deal with the Monday blues feelings.
I don't care if the next day is a school day or work day, I still hate going out when I know I have to wake up early.
If not have migraines AGAIN.


27)I hate re-doing things.
I only do things once, I don't do another time.
Since primary school, teachers have been asking me to redo my work because it's not up to their standard.
I don't care if the work plays a huge percentage in my final results, but I really hate re-doing them.


28)Hates it when someone invades my piracy.
Maybe it's the Gemini thing again?
I think we have one part which we want others to see, and the other part which we want to hide from everyone.
It's like the stage and the backstage.
Maybe to us, life is really about a performance.

29)I don't heed advises. That's why I always learn things through the hard way.
Almost for everything in my life, I learnt them through the hard way.
Otherwise, I would still think it's okay to do it.
From breaking up to changing of my course, I've learnt them through the hard way.
Although I really hate this point about me, but it's still me.


30)I don't like singing.
To me, only professional singers are allowed to sing.
Unless they have perfect pitches.
Otherwise it would give me goosebumps.


31)I would listen to classical music whenever I run out of pop songs in my mind.

I wonder if who else does the same besides me.
Nowadays, pop songs are not as nice as the past.
So I would listen to pieces like Chopin, Franz Liszt and Bach.
I think I am weird.


32)I'm a good procrastinator.
I always do my things at the very last minute.
Near to the deadline, but not crossing the deadline.
Only when there's urgency then I can find my inspiration and motivation.


33)Hate being controlled by others. I don't care whether it's good or bad for me, but don't try me.
I don't care if it's meant well for me or not, but I fucking hate being controlled.
If you're someone I'm not close with, I will surely kill you.



34)Don't really click well with people who are perfectionist and inflexible.
Hate to be with people who wants everything to be of a certain standard.
It wouldn't kill you if they are not perfect right?
There's no perfection in this world.


35)I'm someone who forgives, but never forgets.
I will forgive someone for their mistake.
But if I forget about what they've done to me, then it's my mistake.


36)I'm totally not a morning person at all.
I rather do things at midnight than waking up early to do it.
If school is midnight then it would be better.


37)I like doing things the traditional way, because I think older people are much wiser.
Kind of like things such as herbal tea and TCM to cure minor sickness like sore throat and cough.
It may seem not to work, but these traditional methods works better than western medicines.



38)Was really saddened by the break-up from the last relationship.
It's like the past and I think my thinking have changed a lot since then.
In the past she was like everything to me, but now she's like a piece of fucking spoilt bitch.
Yuck.



39)I always try to remember to bring a packet of tissue paper whenever I go out.
Just in case if I have a flu, stomach pain, or whatever it is for.


40)I'm someone who gets jealous very easily.
I'm really someone who gets jealous easily.
If you've just went for a tour overseas, don't tell me about those fun things that happened.
I won't bother to listen at all.
Unless I'm part of it.



41)I really fucking hate climbing stairs.
I will try any means or ways just to avoid climbing the stairs.
I hate that sour feeling you get when you climb the stairs. 
FUCK!



42)I don't go out for food. I go out to explore.
I only go out to explore.
You will never hear me say things like "There's a famous Tau Huay nearby here.", "The chicken rice here is very nice." or "Let's go and try the Kway Chap at Paya Lebar." or whatever.
I eat to live, not live to eat.


43)I don't have a pencil box.
I'm not a studious person.
I hate books, pencils and pen, and any other things related to education.

When does a relationship sucks - From a guy's perspectives

It's Valentine's day the previous day and it's quite a special day to me too.
Although it's suppose to be a day for love and dating, but I used it to clear away things from the past.

Deleted her contacts, unfollowed her on Instagram and Tumblr, she's out of my life forever. (:

Tried my best to be her boyfriend and ex-boyfriend, but she just couldn't appreciate a fucking shit.

So after a fucking 13 months of separation, I decided to get her out of my life.

It's quite a happy feeling again as I look forward ahead in my life, thinking what kind of surprises i would be getting in the future.

I can foresee that in another 10 years of her life, there wouldn't be someone who would sacrifice his health, money, time, friends, energy, sleep, family, happiness, school, homework for her.

Did lots of crazy things just for her.

I remembered skipping maths class because she was sick, so I went to her house to take care of her, then she chased me out, so I have no choice but to return to school for my project.

Honestly, Dover to Bedok, back and forth, is no joke.

And once I also cabbed down from Woodlands all the way to Ngee Ann Polytechnic just to fucking fetch her back to Bedok because she was giddy, then come back to Woodlands again.

And I made a record of never failing to fetch her back home no matter how early, angry, late, rain or whatever shit.

Did many many many more stuffs for her, too many too list out.

Spent so much on her, like over $1000? Yet she threw everything away when we broke up.

At least give to your brother or pet or the old age home right.

Anyway, I still do wish her all the best in her future stuffs, hope she will fucking be more sensible, sensitive, mature, thoughtful, less-selfish.

When does a relationship sucks - From a guy's perspectives 

Gonna post something random today.
Nothing got to do with Valentine's day, just a random thought.
It's about what a guy feels from a shitty relationship.
It's from my own experience and point of view, so no offense to anybody or whatever shit.
It's only about some relationship, but not all.

When we feel that you treated your ex better than us.

It's actually very fucking easy to feel if you really did love us or not. If you accepted us in a relationship, don't ever fucking give reasons like "having past phobias" or "afraid of being hurt again" or whatever bullshit. Be more matured, this is not some puppy love relationship. Being together with someone who is affected by her own past is FUCKING irritating.



When you clearly show that your family is much more important than us.

We know you love your family more than us, of course. But you don't have to FUCKING prove it or show it to us. 

When you hide us away from your family.

We treated you as if you're part of our family. We took care of you in your family's behalf. Your parents should feel grateful to us when we take care of you while they're away. Why should you hide us away from them? We're not terrorists. We are not young for an underground relationship anymore.

When you don't put in effort to be committed in the relationship.

Relationship is like a full time job, and it takes two people to make it successful. So you better do your part.



When you don't bother to change for the better.

When we have did something wrong, we will try our best to learn and change to suit the relationship. So if you have something we are not happy with, you should change too. Otherwise this relationship will NEVER work out. There's no such thing as a perfect relationship where you find no flaws in each other.

When you treasure your friends more than us.

We take care of you when you're sick, do everything we can to make you happy, sacrifice everything for you. We are the second closest to you apart from your family. So why put friends above us?

When you only need us when you're bored.

We're not an entertainer.

When you cancel our date just because of minor reasons.

This shows how much you really want to fucking see us.



When you could easily say you want a break up.

If you can't handle us at our worst, why should you be with us at our best? Why want to be together in the first place?


Have a sense of responsibility. We trusted you with our happiness, don't make us regret it.

When you are unforgiving.

We're not perfect people, we make mistakes. We forgive you when you made mistakes too. So why hold grudges at us?



When you could be so happy and carefree after breaking up.

We would be so sad after you left us. I don't understand how you could just forget all those shit so fast.

 
Don't get it how some of you can do these just after breaking up.

When you accepted the relationship even when you don't truly love us.

Accept us ONLY if you really love us. Don't accept us just because you want to forget about your previous relationship, or looks, or talent, or whatever shit. Don't fucking cheat feelings.



When you never thought about our future together.

Then why be together in the first place?



When you are unfaithful.

Being faithful means not being too close with other guys. We trust you, but we don't trust the guys. And don't do childish things like two-timing or whatever shit. This really shows how cheap you are.


Hate it when this happens.

When you take us for granted.

We're not a charity organisation. We love you, so we need your love too. 



When you don't even care if we're sick or dead.

When you're sick, we took care of you. When we're sick, you don't bother. When we're really dead, then you would regret.



When you're impatient to go home from our date.

It means you're sick and tired of us? Is your television and your siblings more important than us?

When you're so unwilling to make sacrifices.

Love needs sacrifices. If not how to know that you really love us?



When you don't like being romantic together.

We fucking HATE being FRIENDZONED by our OWN girlfriend.


Have some respect for someone who loves you.

When you're too lazy to visit us at our home.

Means you don't want to see us? Okay can.

When we have to work so hard just to earn back the money we had spent on you.

Money is not easy to earn. If we're willing to spend them on you, it means you really meant a lot to us. Don't make us suffer and regret from it. Have a heart.








Thanks for reading this shit. No offense to anybody (:
Bye~

Rant #1 - 那些在日常生活中会遇到而看不下去的人。

It's the 初三 of Chinese New Year!
Anyway it's quite a fun new year hanging out with cousins and going to places together.
It's been months since I fucking see them(except Wendy, because she is the Tour human).
Anyway wanted to rant some stuffs since quite long ago.
Although it's Chinese New Year, but my rants are not fucking related to it.
Gonna type in some Chinese words, since it's Chinese New Year. (:

Anyway, these things I'm going to type are not referring or pin-pointing to anybody.
But if the shoes fits, feel free to wear it. (:
Just kidding, I'm just ranting. (:

1)那些特别喜欢拍超多自恋照然后post进社交网络上给人家like的人。
I just feel that these people are materialistic and attention seeking. Beauty wouldn't last long. Get REAL.

2)那些觉得他们自己长得美而骄傲的人。
I think inner beauty is much more important than appearance.

3)那些谈恋爱不认真而伤到对方的人。
Stop being immature and wake up your idea. Stop playing with such puppy love thing shit fuck.

4)那些很容易被同侪压力影响到的人。
YUCK. Have your fucking own mind please.

5)那些喜欢取笑和欺负别人的人。
Karma's a bitch. Watch out.

6)那些不可以保存秘密的人。
Trust me, you will never ever have a true friend.

7)那些因为心情偶尔会side你，偶尔会side别人的人。
Two-faced people. Will never get people's trust.

8)那些很容易发脾气的人。
Anger will only makes you live shorter, but doesn't really affect other people.

9)那些对你好有目的的人。
Disgusting.

10)那些喜欢多管闲事的人。
Mind your fucking own business, PLEASE.

11)那些喜欢责怪别人的人。
Losers.

12)那些很容易被心情和天气影响到的人。
Such person will never succeed.

13)那些喜欢让别人感到embarrass的人。
Hope you're not beaten up.

Anyway feel better ranting these out.
No offense to anybody.
Bye (:

雨过天晴。(:

It's quite some time I've not blogged!
Was fucking busy with those last minute projects at the end of the semester.
Lots of things to do and had to stay back in school almost everyday.
It's really quite a hard time when school is the last place I wanna go, and I had to stay back.
Finally, after counting down, it's the end of everything. (:
Don't have to tolerate those troll or whatsoever human already. (:
Although I think that the things they said out sometimes offending and direct, but they are still good humans.

Anyway went to Johor Bahru with Wendy last Sunday for our Malaysia tour, after completing the Singapore tour - North South East West.
Still gonna travel to places like Melaka and Penang to continue with our trip someday.

Although my paint skills are not very good, but I marked those places I went in red circles.

Anyway, we went to City Square first, then to Sutera shopping centre(had to cab there about 20 minutes), and the last was KSL City before coming back to Singapore.

Anyway Chinese New Year is just round the corner so had to do many last minute shopping sprees in town.

Hope I get some Red Packets too. (:

Really broke already.

Last but not least, I made this for fun.

It's a little bit blur but still can be listened.

Enjoy! (:

Bye (:

What I Really Want?

Sometimes I really wonder, what am I going to do in the future?
Have been going through lots of shit ever since I'm out of secondary school.
Before I'm in a relationship, I'm a crazy, talk-nonsense, happy-go-lucky person.
Now I'm partially like that too, maybe not as much as before.

I don't know why, but did I really change so much after all these shit happened?
Especially last year, I've been changing like 12345678987654321 times.
Last time, I used to go out with friends in big groups, occupy my Fridays and weekends with friends that I have totally no time for myself.
But nowadays, sometimes Fridays or Saturdays I'm staying at home, not going out.
Not really sure if people are getting busier, or I am becoming a boring person.
Friends would go out with their friends, or they would cancel meetings at the very last minute.
Although it's quite irritating, but I'm used to it already.

Thanks to my polytechnic humans, I'm learning how to "shoot" people back whenever I'm being "shoot".
I hope it prepares me for the army, where there are many fucking this type of people.
Not really good or bad, but they are just another type of friends.
Quite new to this culture because most of my friends wouldn't do such things.

Anyway it's another 2 weeks and I don't have to see this class anymore.
Really don't feel comfortable being with another half of the class.
I really can't communicate with them at all.
They are just a bunch of people who are obsessed and addicted or whatever shit, with studying.
I don't match well with such type of "all work but no play makes Jack a dull boy" people.
Maybe it's about horoscope or whatever shit.
Hope I will meet fun and caring people in the future! (:

Anyway, I just seen this about my Chinese zodiac downstairs my house.

Wonder if this would be true or not.

It says I would meet another half HAHAHA

I just don't want to meet someone like that girl again.

It's really like an atomic bomb of my life.

After it explodes, the bomb disappeared and I have to pick myself up pieces by pieces.

Even now, I'm still picking them one by one, but there's improvement. (:

I think you can see that my blog is less "emo" nowadays. (:

Anyway for my career, I feel like being a self employed, opening a small company of firm that does events management/tourism/music/business, either one of them.

I have to admit that I hate listening to people's instructions, I like doing things alone with my own pace and style.

I hate doing things and not getting the benefits instantly.

For example, I hate people telling me to study hard then I will be successful in the future.

I want the benefits now, or in the early future.

If i work hard now, I want the salary to come latest by the end of the month.

I hate being discipline.

I'm someone inconsistent, I slack like fuck and will do work like fuck, only if I'm interested in it.

And I'm really fickle minded.

I chose engineering as a stepping stone to university.

Then I want to do something else other than engineering.

So my results may be shitty in this course.

I really want to do something I like, because "When you work for something you love, you don't have to work a single day".

And sincerely, I really hate doing projects and redoing them.

I hate staying back after school.

Just another 2 weeks to end this semester.

Another 11 months to end final-year-project.

Another 1 year 1 month to end all these bullshit! (:

The Singapore tour 4

Went for the Singapore Tour 4 with Wendy last Saturday again.
This time round was the south expedition.
Went to explore the southern green corridors of Singapore.
Was quite a tiring day, with the climbing of the Southern Ridges - Kent Ridge, Telok Blangah Hill, Mount Faber.
Although I had much school work to do, but I don't really care anyway.
I prioritise social life, exploring places, searching for inspirations, more than studying.
It doesn't mean that I wouldn't study, but I will not be crazy/obsessed over it.
Who says people who can't score GPA 4.0 cannot survive in Singapore?
Those who study well and get into university will get a stable income, but those who did not, they may be rich or poor, depending on what they are going to do in the future.

[Singapore Tour 4 - Southern Ridges]

Anyway, gonna post some pictures of the places I've went last Saturday.
Let the pictures tell the story. (:

First stop - Haw Par Villa. 

Quite a deserted place. In the past, it used to be as crowded as Orchard Road.

Weird statues which has a meaning to it.

Madam white snake.

苦海无涯，回头是岸。My Mandarin is quite cui, but I think it means "There's no end to a bitter sea, think twice before you regret."

Weird Qing Dynasty Manchu outfit. Looks like a dracula in the Hong Kong horror movies.

Wendy 自恋 just at the entrance of the 10 courts of hell.

Kent Ridge park,

Climbing up the hill at the foot of Kent Ridge.

I think this is Alexandra arch or something.

Sunset, as seen from HortPark.

Monkey at HortPark.

Henderson waves. Almost broke our legs when we reach here.

Labrador Park area, as seen from Henderson waves.

At the top of the whole shit.

Nice clouds~

Can see the sea from here!~

Orchard, Bukit Merah, Raffles Place, Chinatown, etc.

Beautiful sky (:

THE END